The freakout has landed.

[debetesse]

Yup.

Damn near broke down crying in the Family Room tonight (It's not inconcievable that I will before I fall asleep).

There are days when I really see the appeal in systems like Germany's. Structures and next-steps. This free-form career stuff is wicked stressful. Granted, this is my first real step without a solid safety structure (well, apart from move-back-home-and-find-work-that-doesn't-make-me-broke-and/or-crazy. Or, the "Midnight Train to Georgia" route.)

You know, most of the time, I'm actually a pretty up-beat, fairly low-stress person. Of course, I also thought of myself as someone who doesn't need a lot of structure. I know that the real world is supposed to be more complicated or stressful or whatever, but, really, I'd like for there to be something that's, if not easy, at least steady. And, honestly, at this moment, I can't think of anything that is. So, hopefully, I'll stop being less of a downer at some point in the future. Believe me, I'm looking forward to it more than you are.

Comments

[mearagrrl.livejournal.com]

Big hugs. You're very right that lack of structure can be hugely overwhelming...which is why some people go right to grad school or the military or the peace corps, more to have familiar ground than because they're dying to do that. Don't fall in the trap! You'll do great!

[fiorituranotte.livejournal.com]

{{{hugs}}} The freak out was bound to happen, but you are going to be fine. Best of luck with everything.

[la-perkins.livejournal.com]

You will do fine. You are taking a big step, and it is only natural that you are freaking out a little, but hopefully it will only be a very short period before the structure/steady comes back.

Also, remember you have plenty of buffista friends in LA, who will help out when they can, even if it is just buying you coffee and letting you freak out for an hour.