Hi, my name's Abi, and I'm

an amateur theatre snob.

I am the axiom that a little knowledge is dangerous.

I can tell you that the same reason I like the stage version of Little Shop is the same reason I hate Damn Yankees

I can point out that "Somewhere that's green" sounds an awful lot like "Part of your world" for a reason

I can go on about how the fact that both the leads were singing outside of their range probably means they were cast by the director with little or no input from the musical director, if he's worth his salt.

I can hold forth on actors who sing, singers who act, and the rare creatures who are both.

I notice the lighting system.

I can bitch, at length, about the use of body mics in relatively small HS auditoriums. At length. This bitch will include references to High School Musical (It's auditions, dammit)

I can explain that the difficulty of staging songs is to keep them visually interesting while the actor is singing. another. verse.

I can talk about the importance of respecting walls, even if they're imaginary.

I glare at the follow-spot op when they fuck up.

I can make jokes about white teenagers' near-universal lack of rhythm and never ever moving their hips.

I can explain why white should be used or worn sparingly or never, and always consciously.

And even after I do several (but not all. I have that much courtesy) of these, I can still say that, for a HS show, it wasn't bad at all.

It's funny: I'll help move stupid sets and latex on stupid mics and fit stupid costumes. But I'll still be disappointed when people can't do things at least as well as I can (my own personal standard of competence)

It also means that when I go see a show, I can almost never turn off my backstage brain and just enjoy it.

On a semi-related note, I'm auditioning for Much Ado tomorrow. Wish me fluency.