debetesse: (Default)
Let me be clear, it is not that I am unable to knit starlight into the things I make. I am capable of doing so and have done on multiple occasions. Being a fundamentally nocturnal creature, I tend more toward starlight and moonlight—very rarely, though. One does not call on the Moon lightly—in my creations than toward rays of the Sun. I can do these things, and I have even found ways to streamline the process. But the process, however streamlined, is still tedious and cumbersome. So know, if you ask for strands of starlight and I smile and nod, that it is an even greater display of affection than the item itself. It is one thing to offer my efforts to The Ladies on your behalf, to knit up strands cleanly and beautifully that you might wrap them around yourself as protection against the unravelings of fate. It is another thing on top of that to capture the light of the stars to shine for you when you find yourself in darkness. Though it is a thing worth doing, there are many things worth doing, and a second boon must, by its nature, preclude some other. So, knitting starlight is a thing I can do, but know what it is that you ask for, and know what it is that I offer.
debetesse: (Default)
When you have a freshly-written script for a PSA based on a joke from a radio sitcom from another country sitting on your desktop and plans to film, edit, and release it...

And the annotated Shelley* and complete Milton** are serving as mutual bookmarks on your bedroom floor...

And you have a presentation script due tomorrow--sorry, today--that you really ought to be writing...

you might reasonably be mistaken for a humanities major.***

There are times when I think one should be able to earn credits toward a degree in cultural and media studies through fandom activities. I have certainly had higher-level discussions online than I have with my classmates, more than a couple times.

But there is a Life of the Mind aspect of education that seems to be fading, as more and more students go to college seeking to be trained for the sole purpose of getting a good job. I know it's an incredibly privileged position to take, but it makes me sad when students ask what the point of something is, and respond to the instructor's "it's just so cool!" with a "why would that matter?" rather than "Yeah, this is not my thing, but I get it: I have my own just-so-cool thing."

I can't honestly say that I wish I lived in a society where there were regular, well-attended public lectures: I don't generally go, even when I have the chance, but I read, and I listen to podcasts, and I wish...I wish the room would keep up with me, more often than it does in meatspace.

Yeah, there are a half-dozen ideas here that are begging for their own posts, but that is work for another day.

**poetical. ISTG, the word "poetical" is on the cover.
***I'm not, for the record. The presentation is part of my coursework for a doctoral program (clinical, not PhD).
debetesse: (Sense of Direction)
I was having an imaginary conversation this evening,* during which I managed to get my room into a reasonably habitable condition. I also went to the gym and worked out and finished my homework for one class today. Now, yes, I am not commenting on the pile of dishes that are now in the sink, the unfortunate backtracking the scale at the gym showed me, or the major assignment I am procrastinating on. But it is progress, and it is something that I can build on tomorrow (especially given that the assignment is due on Tuesday).

Next May, I will be leaving here, off to spend a year living in at least three different places. In preparation for that, I have begun to sort my things, not so much into the sheep and the goats as into the sheep, goats, alpacas, rabbits, llamas, and yaks. Some things, I wish to keep, in the long term, but will not need in the next two years: these things can begin to make their way to my parents’ house for storage, so that there is as little to move as possible in May. Some things, I will need in the next year, but not in the year following: my television will fall into this category, as will at least one of my bookshelves. Some things, I really don’t need at all: I’m trying to get rid of those. Some things, I will want to have with me: ideally, these will all fit into my car, so that moving at least three times will be as easy as possible. It is possible that I will be going overseas for a month. In that case, I will need another category: things that go with me on the plane.

Today, I’ve selected a bagful of books from my shelves that can go to Indiana when I do next month. This paring down of belonging will continue and probably only get more difficult. I already have fewer things than many people I know, and I find myself torn between the desire to have less Stuff and the desire to make my temporary spaces my own through my belongings. The itinerant year will be a crucible for that, I think, and I expect that when I come out the other side, out of school and into a job and a place to live, I will be a bit surprised at some of what burned off and what didn’t.

*Don’t judge me. I live alone. It’s either that or talk to the cat, and all he ever says is “fucking pet me,” “fucking feed me,” or “fuck off.” He came from a home with toddlers and allergies, so I don’t blame him for this attitude. I’m sure I’ll do a post or several on these imaginary conversations at some point.


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November 2012

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